She’s All Yours

By:  Terri Gordon

Disclaimer:  I don’t own CSI, it’s characters, or anything else associated with the show other than the DVDs… although if I did, Sara and Grissom would’ve gotten together a long time ago, Ecklie would’ve been killed, and Warrick would be mine.  :-D

Spoilers:   513: Nesting Dolls

Rating:   PG, for mild language

Summary: G/S, cause that’s how it should be.   My own version as to what happened in the episode 513, in-between when we see Grissom at her apartment and when we see him in Ecklie’s office.

A/N:  They never showed what happened after Sara spilled her guts about her family… All we know is that Grissom was stunned into silence, not knowing how to comfort her, and he took her hand so show his support.  What happened next?  That’s what I’d like to know.  So I wrote this, in hopes that the writers would somehow realize that they really do need to just put them together and end all the sexual tension!

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“Do you think there’s a murder gene?”

“I don’t believe that genes are a predictor of violent behavior.”

"You wouldn't know that in my house.  The fights... the yelling, the trips to the hospital.  I... thought it was the way that everybody lived.  When my mother... killed my father, I found out that it wasn't."

Not knowing what else to do, Grissom took her hand as she sobbed and watched her grip tighten as she tried to draw from his strength.  Feeling the tension on his arm rise, he moved closer, electing to sit on the arm of her chair, all the while keeping hold of her hand.  As he sat, she leaned in and cried into his side, the wetness of her tears soaking into his shirt.

“Sara…” he whispered when she had quieted but refused to draw back.

The sound of her name on his lips broke the spell.  She sat up and plastered a smile on her face, sniffling back the remaining tears.

“I’m sorry,” she said with a dry little chuckle, wiping at the smudge mark she’d created on his shirt.

Grissom looked down at her.  “For what?”  When she looked up in confusion, he smiled a bit to reassure her before continuing.   “Sara… if I had known-”

“But you didn’t,” she interrupted.  “No one did, and I’d like to keep it that way.”

“But why?” he challenged.  “If they knew-”

“What?  Catherine would go easier on me?  Ecklie would keep my job for me?  No, Grissom.  I won’t give them the satisfaction.”

He sighed and shook his head.  “Why won’t you open up?” he whispered.

“Why won’t you, Grissom?”  She stood, her anger rising.  “How dare you ask me that when I just told you the one thing I’ve never told anyone else?!”

“I didn’t mean it like that, Sara, and you know it.”  He rose to meet her, speaking soft and gentle, silently wishing for a chance to hold her.

When he didn’t get angry, Sara’s rage dissolved into despair.  Sighing, she walked past him, hanging her head, and then said so softly that he had to strain to hear her, “It’s just so hard to let go when you see it recreated every night right before your eyes… when you’ve lived the life of the victim, and you want so badly to do for them what no one could do for you…”

Moving up behind her, he whispered, “I know, honey.”

Turning, she raised an eyebrow.  While she had heard him, she didn’t want to call attention to what he had just called her, especially since he had probably done it unintentionally.  Instead, she challenged him.

“How would you know?  What did your mother ever do to screw up your life?”

“My mother did nothing.  She accepted what happened with dignity and grace.”

She felt him withdrawing as the conversation shifted.  Willing him to stay open with her, she closed the gap between them and laid her head on his shoulder, asking quietly, “What happened?”

His arms instinctively wrapped around her and a few moments later, he met her gaze… As he stared into her deep brown orbs, he was amazed to find all his apprehensiveness melt away.  They had a connection and somehow, it became so much easier to tell her, knowing that she might understand.

“My father left when I was five, and not long after that, she went deaf.”

Sara pulled back in shock, partly because he had trusted her with his past, and partly because he too understood the pain of parental dysfunction.  As her mind reeled, she was pulled to a certain memory from four years earlier, and something clicked.

“That’s where you learned to sign…”

Nodding silently, he fought the rising flood of emotions concerning his past and tried to focus on why he was there.  Feeling her watching him, he looked once again into the eyes that so often held him captive, eyes that bore into his soul to purge him of the world’s evils.  At that moment, he couldn’t think of a single moment when he didn’t love her.

Her voice brought him back to the present.

“Sorry,” he muttered, backing away from her.

But she wouldn’t let him.

“For what?” she parroted, closing the gap once more, this time pulling him into a hug.  “Thank you,” she whispered.  “For everything… I needed this.”

Letting go, he looked at her with love in his eyes.  “You also need rest.  Go get some sleep… I need to start shift in a few hours anyways.”

She started to protest, but when he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek ever so lightly, she smiled and obeyed.

Grissom walked out to his car wondering what he was going to tell Ecklie.  He couldn’t fire her… No, correction:  He wouldn’t  fire her.  She was a damn good CSI and he’d trust her with his life.  More than that, she was the only woman he’d ever love, and he trusted her with his heart.

Sitting in the driver’s seat of his Denali, he looked up to see her face through the curtains of her apartment window.  Drawing inspiration from the  gap-toothed grin he’d recognize anywhere, he put the vehicle into gear and headed for the lab.

“She’s a great criminalist, Conrad.  And I need her.”

“I’m sure you do. … You know what?  She’s a loose cannon with a gun.  And she’s all yours.”